How to remove the stress from goal setting

Me in the SMT Production of Annie

I have always been a woman of ambition - I always had a plan. 
I was going to be an actress and a singer; whether it be on film, television or stage. Julie Andrews was my inspiration and my dream was to have a career like her. 
The hills were alive and so was I.

There was no doubt in my mind.

In a nutshell, my plan was move to California, get married, have kids, and be an entrepreneur with a million dollars in my bank account. 

Did I mention, that I was going to do all of this by 25?

I have no idea how I came up with this plan, but at 25 years old the reality was that I had just broken up with my boyfriend and I was drowning my sorrows in pints of SuperKid ice cream; gaining 30 pounds.

I remember feeling lost and not knowing what to do. My plan was failing and so was I.  What was I going to do? I didn’t know! What did I do?  I re-created my plan and set new goals with the help of the Oprah Winfrey show and her inspirational guests like Iyanla Vanzant.

The most important things that I learned from these powerful women were;

•  I am enough.
• I cannot make anyone else happy; only me.

Here are a few tidbits from my goal setting toolkit:

1. Set grace goals.

We still want and need to set goals, but we need to shift how we think about them.  We need to leave room for change and not be bound by them.

2. Give yourself permission to make mistakes.

We are not perfect. We are human and mistakes will happen, so use mistakes as a learning tool.

 3. You can start over again,again, and again.

Be confident and trust that everything will work out.

4. Be kind to yourself.

Celebrate all of your accomplishments not matter how small they are; even if it’s just a happy dance.

The truth is many years later, I got married, had two beautiful daughters and I still feel lost sometimes, but I am hopeful.

Do you think goal setting works?

Key words:

Stress

Goals

Lost

Dreams

Life

Change